Finding your own identity in a world of spit up, changing diapers and no sleep can be a tough feat. You used to be this strong and career driven woman who would stop at nothing to get that big promotion and impress your boss, but once you have a child, priorities shift. That huge project you once had your heart set on is now being pulled on string by string, by the little hands of your budding baby. Sure, you may go back to work and eventually get to work on that said project, but the feeling of knowing there’s that little special someone waiting at home for you changes things.
Someone once told me that this is “just a moment in your life.” I live by that sentiment every single day. The truth is my little man won’t want to hold my hand or give me one last kiss before bed someday. So each and everyday I promise to capture the moment I am in. Hold still, turn off my phone and relish in the pure bliss of being mom.
However, every mom at one point or another poses the question, “Who am I, other than mommy?” It can be tough to find the time to be yourself and enjoy the things you once loved, when you immerse yourself into being the mommy and wife you think your family wants you to be. You have the constant burden of what to make for dinner, is my child getting in enough time with me, there’s loads of laundry and dishes with my name on it. Let’s not forget how many more questions enter your psyche, when another child pops into the equation. The truth, is often times, your child is more than fine, because you’re questioning it. Order takeout, put the chores on hold and do what you love, what defines YOU. Whether it means joining a book club, taking a dance class, going for a run or even just writing in a journal. These things are important to keeping true to who you are and in the long run if you’re happy, then your family is happy for it!
Try to find a sense of community. This year I took it upon myself to become my son’s room mom for his class. Only two weeks in and I feel a sense of purpose in my community. Volunteering my time for my son and his pals has meant so much to me already. I’ve been able to connect with the other moms, find partnerships and make new friends. We all have one thing in common and that’s to ensure our children are getting the nourishment and education we had always hoped for, so that they can someday become positive contributing members of our society. So why not join the PTA or help with a major school event? You’ll be glad you did.
Next time you get down and out about your friends on Facebook, who are enjoying a nice glass of pinot by the lake and that fact that you haven’t taken a shower all day, relish in the fact that you are making one of the hardest sacrifices out there. To give up your dreams and aspirations for “just a moment in your life,” and before you know it, you’ll only have the memories to look back on.
-Briana D.