Tag: parenting

Nobody’s Killing it!

Ok, I’ve gotta be honest. I’ve been a little quiet around here or at least it seems that way….Anyone else feel like they’re just going through the motions? Not sure if it’s because we have been in this COVID vortex for quite some time or maybe it’s, because I lost my best friend furry Sushi (our beloved pup of 17 years) and I can’t seem to quite bounce back from it just yet. 

Sure, I have some good days and bad, but I’ve come to the realization that COVID is here to stay. So what does that mean? Also, why has it become SO politicized? I assume it’s because we’re in an election year. 

Here’s the deal. We as parents thought we had it hard to begin with? Add a national pandemic to the mix and you’re in a for a real treat! It’s up to us to juggle all the things. I would be lying if I didn’t feel like I’ve lost myself some in the midst of all this. Whether you’re homeschooling and working full-time (there’s NO right or wrong answer), working from home or having to wear a mask and better yet work diligently to save lives all day…2020 is HARD. Now more than ever we HAVE got to set aside some time for what makes us, US. Ask yourself…is it reading a book? Watching some trash TV? Enjoying a quiet dinner after the kids are asleep? I’m telling you now that if don’t schedule it, it won’t happen. I’ve got to be honest, I’m pretty good about setting apart me time, but I would be lying to myself and all of you if I came off as someone who has it all together. I’m nearing my breaking point, pulling at straws to keep life as we know it normal. I’m also here to tell you that NOBODY is killing it! Everyone in their respective lanes is taking on this pandemic in different ways and suffering loss in more ways than one! Loss of a social life, loss of funds, loss of friends and even the loss of actual family members. 

I think the first step is to realize that we are living in the new normal. That big parties and gatherings are a thing of the past. Although they might be in our future, it won’t be the same for awhile. Perhaps its ok to give someone a hug (masks on), but then keep your distance. Here’s the other thing, if the kids need to go to school for your own sanity, then send them! If you need to head to the gym to interact with others and work out…do it! The bottom line is mental health is just as important as physical. I’m learning this everyday. Give yourself permission to do what you feel is right and screw everyone else, because after all we only have one shot, one opportunity on this planet. Maybe instead of saying nobody is killing it, instead we should say you’re killing it! So in the words my old friend Teo, “Go Big or Go Home!”

-Briana D.

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Top 5 reasons to Become an Entrepreneur

  1. Get to do what you’re passionate about. Life’s too short to do spend your precious time doing things you don’t enjoy. Find something that fuels your passion and do it!
  2. Create your own hours. Being an entrepreneur is not for the faint of heart. However, it does provide you some great flexibility. You can work around your children, spouse or partner’s schedules, work from your pajamas and best of all you don’t have to put in time to take off work. However, you do have to show up every. single. day.
  3. Endless tax benefits. Gas? Write off. New Computer? Write off. Owning a business, you do have to make some initial investments, but the best part is that you can write most of them off! Talk to your CPA for more information. 
  4. Present for your family and the things you love most. Nothing gives me greater pleasure, than being able to take my daughter to swim and gymnastics and my son to t-ball and help him with his homework. When you go into business for yourself, you can pick up and put down the business whenever you want. It’s important to stay present in these moments. Something I’m definitely working on all the time. 
  5. Make as little or as much $$ as you want. 
  6. No one says you have to work yourself to the bone to achieve massive success. However, it’s important to know your worth and reach for the stars. You can’t equate  the amount of “hours” you put in on the daily. You just have to have a vision and goal and seek out to make it happen!

Top 5 reasons to join Beautycounter:

  1. Build a business with meaning. At Beautycounter our mission is to get safer products into the hands of everyone. It’s not often you get to work for a company, where you can make a significant social impact and money at the same time. Our products are also highly luxurious. 
  2. Advocate for change. Meet with members of Congress to help enforce the Personal Care Product Safety Act. As it stands the U.S. only bans 30 ingredients in personal care products. At Beautycounter, we ban 1,500. Every formula goes through a rigorous test and is screened for safety. The work our army of advocates do is  incredibly important, because it affects everyone. Everyone means everyone. Fast Company recognized Beautycounter as one of the top 50 innovative companies in the U.S. and number ONE in the beauty category. Google also recognized us as the #1 trending brand of 2018! There’s no better time to jump on this fast moving train then now!! 
  3. Change lives. One of our pillars is to educate people on the topic of safety. You can change someone’s life by arming them with information to make better and more informed decisions. People work out, eat healthy foods and then unknowingly douse themselves in products that contain harmful ingredients. It’s our job to help the one we love, make the switch to safer, Beautycounter or otherwise. Educating people with regards to changing their products from one’s that contains harmful and unnecessary ingredients like Parabens, phlatates and formaldehyde most commonly used in beauty products that is now a $60B industry!
  4. Community. Our incredible advocates or consultants are amazing. The network of women I’ve met along the way are not only inspiring, but are here to help. Whether you want to work the business part-time, full-time, you need ideas or just someone to vent to. I’ve made lifelong friends through this company and for that it’s been worth it! 
  5. The amazing icing on top! As a consultant you receive 25% off everything you buy and are eligible to make up to 35% commissions on everything you sell. You’re eligible for bonuses, incentive trips, free products. Each kit comes with everything you need to get started, our hero overnight resurfacing peel, a long wear color intense lipstick and your back office training through Counter University. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain.

Some ways I’ve been able to incorporate the business into my day to day…

  1. I do product drop offs to and from events and schools drop offs and pick-ups.
  2. I usually workout and schedule my work time after that until I have to pick up my children from school. I then pick the business back up during quiet time and occasionally at night once they fall asleep. 
  3. I don’t have an immense social media following, but I use what I’ve got to create a small community of people that are interested in what I have to put out. Everyone out there has something they want to share with the world and equally there’s someone out there that wants to hear it. If you’re a graphic designer, a teacher or a finance person you can absolutely incorporate that into Beautycounter’s mission. 
  4. I pick it up when I want and set it down when I want.

Top 5 Favorite Products: 15% off through April 15th!

  1. Countercontrol Pore Cleanser
  2. Countermatch Adaptive Moisture Lotion
  3. Overnight Resurfacing Peel
  4. Rejuvenating Eye Cream
  5. Moisturizing Tint Skin Foundation
  6. The BUSINESS OPPORTUNITY!

If nothing else, support the cause by purchasing through me and using your wallet to urge congress to pass better beauty laws and text “BETTERBEAUTY” to 52886 today!

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Put Your Oxygen Mask On First

You’ve heard this before while on an airplane. In the event of an emergency, place your oxygen masks on first and then your child’s…but have you really ever put those words into perspective before? Someone once mentioned that old adage to me before and that lesson really stuck with me. If I’m not right, then how can my children be? As parents it is within our natural instincts and DNA to take care of literally everyone else in our household (including our pets), before even worrying about ourselves. Making sure that all are fed, changed and happy, before taking a bite to eat, much less a shower. I’m here to tell you that it’s ok to do YOU. Have you ever heard the expression “Happy wife, happy life?” Well the same goes for happy moms and dads! If you are in this mindset that you must take care of every little thing your toddler or even spouse asks of you, without taking care of your basic necessities, then you WILL crash and burn.

I remember it all too well. I had my first born baby boy a little over 5 years ago. My world came to a screeching halt! I know I can say the same for my husband. We didn’t care about the things that made us, “us.” Was the baby sleeping? Was he breathing? Was he pooping? Well, what time did he poop? We were literally documenting when he ate, slept and passed a bowel on timers on our iPhones! All the while, a little piece of us were fading away. Now, I’m not saying it’s not important to put some things on the back burner to take care of this little human who needs you literally to sustain LIFE, but I think it was a breaking point for the both of us, when we started to lose sight of the last time WE ate or took 5. I don’t mean 5 minutes together (although that’s crucial), but completely alone! I remember my husband calling out to me saying, “Hey Bri? When was the last time you ate?” I honestly couldn’t remember? I was too sleep deprived, too obsessed with this new normal, that it didn’t really occur to me that if I wasn’t taking care of ME, how on earth would that baby be able to sustain without ME? Once I realized that…yes things started to shift, but still ‘til this day I need to constantly remind myself that it isn’t selfish to take 20 minutes to write, because that’s my passion and what makes me, ME. That if going for a bike ride makes me feel better than by golly, I had better start pedaling!

Even while I write this article, my five-year-old has interrupted me to ask me what’s for dessert, because he finished his soup! He can wait two more minutes for that cookie. He’ll live.

Again, while I reminisce of the craziest yet exciting time in our lives, it had been days, maybe even weeks since my husband and I had even noticed one another, because we were so focused on baby! I remember us both putting him down after a screaming, crying fit, 3 calls to the nurse asking why our baby was crying…only to get the response, “Well ma’am, all babies cry.” LOL She was right. We turned to one another and hugged. It was the first time since I didn’t have a big bump separating us and in that moment, I was instantly transported to that bright sunny day on 10.10.10 overlooking the ocean, when we said our “I Do’s”. It was in that moment, that I knew everything was going to be alright.

Ultimately, my children, husband and even my dog will always be first, but I’ve finally started to get back to being me. Even if that means having to schedule in a date night in advance (something to look forward to), starting my own blog (heck yes! One of the best decisions to take that leap!), starting my own business (Yes, it’s been quite the busy year and I’ve got enough bosses under one roof!), taking the time to give myself a little makeover and maybe someday writing that book I’ve always wanted to write. I’m slowly getting back to being me and I can’t encourage you enough to do the same…or at least try to, because there’s only one YOU in the world and you’ve got an army of people who depend on that!

-Briana D.

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mommy of two

It’s hard to imagine my life before kids. I used to always envision what it would be like to have children and here I am. Lucky as ever… with a healthy boy and girl in tow. Some days are hard, I mean REAL hard. There are days you think will never end, days when you have to tell yourself over and over they are your purpose in life and days when you feel like a janitor, left to clean boogers, vomit, poop and pee. Sorry for the mental picture.

Then there’s the anxiety. Something I never really quite experienced until I became a mom. Are they breathing? Are they hungry? Are they sleepy? Are they clean? Are they safe?

Just when I was starting to get the hang of this mom thing, the hubby and I decided to shake things up a bit. Baby number two. When we found out we were having a girl, we were ecstatic! I started to envision dance recitals, spa days and bows, bows, bows! I was so excited for my son to be a big brother to a cute little “sissy,” (that’s become her nickname these days). Then all of a sudden, I stopped in my tracks. Wait! How on earth was I going to be able to love another human being as much as my little boy? Sure I had the same setiment about my son and my husband when I was first pregnant, but this surely had to be different. I didn’t have enough of myself to give I thought…do I? How would I manage to split myself in two? Would I have to choose sides? Who would I bathe first? Who would I play with first? Then the age old mom anxiety kicked into high gear.

Nine months went by and she was finally here! Just like that, my heart expanded. So much so it nearly burst! Things fell right into place. Sissy had an immediate part in our little nest we had created for our family. It all made perfect sense. She belonged here with us, as if sent from the heavens above. It might sound cliché, but it was so true. She was here to teach my son about compassion and kindness, my husband about the truest of all emotions and me? Well, she’s taught me about the unconditional love between a mother and daughter and in turn made me appreciate my own mother more so. She’s made me want more for her than I had ever had for myself.

Life with two has been interesting to say the least. My son will always be a mama’s boy and the one who gave me the fortunate chance to be a mom to begin with, and for that I will be forever grateful. He is my inspiration. My daughter has afforded me the opportunity to see myself in her eyes. To relive my childhood again and to understand why my mom always wanted to wear matching outfits. Although, I still sometimes struggle with who to bathe first or play with first, I settle on doing it together as a family, because for me they are my purpose and my driving force and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

-Briana D.

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mommy of one

C16D0E37-0C01-4400-9853-04328C1B5646.jpegThese past couple of days as a mommy of one have been pretty bittersweet. As the days and minutes wind down until we welcome our pretty princess, I can’t help but reflect on the amazing times we’ve shared with our first born baby prince. The opportunity my husband has afforded us to be able to have spent the last three and a half years together making memories, taking naps, going on walks, potty training and just being “us,” is something I could never repay him for. Some fond memories that come to mind are our trips to the beach, the pool and the library. Making new friends, taking countless mommy and me classes, watching him grow day by day, learn things piece by piece. Often times, things got a bit chaotic, just like anything else, but I am thankful for those moments too, because it has made me appreciate both the good and bad times we shared. I especially enjoyed taking him to his first movie, painting ceramics together and going on his first trip to Disney as a family. These are moments I will never forget and I know my husband too will cherish for the rest of our lives.

Soon another bundle of joy will be added to the mix. I can’t help but wonder how my little man will take to her. Sure, I know he will be a softie, smushy boy who will protect her. I just want him to know how much of a special place he holds in my heart. How, because of him, I was able to be the mother I always dreamed I would be. I hope he continues to look at me the way he has since the first days our eyes locked. I hope I can always make him feel proud of me, make him feel loved and as if he is the most important person in this world. I know it’s normal to beg the question of how on earth will I be able to make room in my heart for another baby? To love them just as much as my first? From what I understand, you just do and I am looking forward to finding out what that feels like.

Briana D.

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the “mom-denity” crisis

 

Finding your own identity in a world of spit up, changing diapers and no sleep can be a tough feat. You used to be this strong and career driven woman who would stop at nothing to get that big promotion and impress your boss, but once you have a child, priorities shift. That huge project you once had your heart set on is now being pulled on string by string, by the little hands of your budding baby. Sure, you may go back to work and eventually get to work on that said project, but the feeling of knowing there’s that little special someone waiting at home for you changes things.

Someone once told me that this is “just a moment in your life.” I live by that sentiment every single day. The truth is my little man won’t want to hold my hand or give me one last kiss before bed someday. So each and everyday I promise to capture the moment I am in. Hold still, turn off my phone and relish in the pure bliss of being mom.

However, every mom at one point or another poses the question, “Who am I, other than mommy?” It can be tough to find the time to be yourself and enjoy the things you once loved, when you immerse yourself into being the mommy and wife you think your family wants you to be. You have the constant burden of what to make for dinner, is my child getting in enough time with me, there’s loads of laundry and dishes with my name on it. Let’s not forget how many more questions enter your psyche, when another child pops into the equation. The truth, is often times, your child is more than fine, because you’re questioning it. Order takeout, put the chores on hold and do what you love, what defines YOU. Whether it means joining a book club, taking a dance class, going for a run or even just writing in a journal. These things are important to keeping true to who you are and in the long run if you’re happy, then your family is happy for it!

Try to find a sense of community. This year I took it upon myself to become my son’s room mom for his class. Only two weeks in and I feel a sense of purpose in my community. Volunteering my time for my son and his pals has meant so much to me already. I’ve been able to connect with the other moms, find partnerships and make new friends. We all have one thing in common and that’s to ensure our children are getting the nourishment and education we had always hoped for, so that they can someday become positive contributing members of our society. So why not join the PTA or help with a major school event? You’ll be glad you did.

Next time you get down and out about your friends on Facebook, who are enjoying a nice glass of pinot by the lake and that fact that you haven’t taken a shower all day, relish in the fact that you are making one of the hardest sacrifices out there. To give up your dreams and aspirations for “just a moment in your life,” and before you know it, you’ll only have the memories to look back on.

-Briana D.

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